And we still might need support at times
Our adult life now extends a lot longer with more variation and stages than for any previous generation. We are healthier and have more options than our parents, grandparents, and great grandparents.
We experience lots of transitions as we move through the decades…moving into work and changing careers, moving into serious relationships and out of them, starting families and child raising, health challenges, mature age study, travel, moving homes, caring for parents, starting new and different phases over 50 or 60 years.
The interesting thing is just how long we feel young.
Not only in our 20s, which is all our grandparents knew. We may not even feel we’ve reached our peak health and performance in our 30s. Even if our body starts to show wear and tear in our 40s or 50s, and new conditions require medication or extra effort, most days we still feel we’re young.
We might feel young, capable and healthy, all things considered, for most of our lives.
As a society, we can ‘t seem to agree when old is. Yes, 85 might get consensus but what about 75? Many at this age don’t feel old, per se. These days, mid-life and young-old have merged.
And with these extra years of vibrancy, we have extra hurdles and opportunities along the way. We probably experience more big transitions than any previous generation.
Our crises can take many forms. We may face relationship breakdown, job loss, career loss, a serious health problem for ourselves or of someone we love. There’s stress from high mortgages, empty nest, relocation, estrangement, retirement and more. Life brings a lot to deal with, along with the high points.
Just as with the traditional midlife crisis, there can be great sadness, loss, anxiety, worry and the need to do things very differently.
Even when we’ve planned the change, when it’s actually something we want, it can be hard to adapt to a new situation. There’s likely substantial uncertainty and risk, before things settle.
This long and winding life journey is a main reason why counselling and therapy is now considered an everyday support, not just for those with serious mental problems. We all need help sometimes. A soft place to fall that is in addition to friends and family. Some will have a spiritual advisor but for many, there’s no one and our challenges are so much more.
Counselling has become normal, and clients have more status than previously, when your treatment was strictly dictated by a diagnosis. Today, a counsellor will be interested in you as a whole person, not just having a problem to be fixed.
Today, when you feel a time of stress is getting the better of you, trust yourself. Help is available. Counselling can be regarded as one of a team to support you, along with your GP, dentist, physiotherapist, alternative health practitioner, masseur, a pilates instructor or their equivalent.
This change reflects our new, long life with much to navigate.
Despite times of being sad, anxious and depressed…we push through.